January 18, 2017

Woman Tried To Smuggle Boyfriend Out Of Jail In Her Suitcase

It’s amazing what the right yoga regimen can do for a person. Jose Vargas Garcia was almost able to escape his nine-year prison sentence in Venezuela by folding himself into a suitcase to be casually rolled out the front door. Unfortunately, when his girlfriend tried to roll the pink luggage outside, she struggled with its weight, prompting guards to search her carry-on and discover a person in clear violation of the 3 ounces of liquid limit. Garcia and his girlfriend will finally be together at last, now that she is joining him behind bars.

Yes, I want to sound marginally more intelligent: