Trump Winning And A Brazilian Shuffle

PNUT GALLERY

What was your greatest achievement at age 15? This teenager discovered a lost Mayan city by comparing star charts with satellite images …from his home in Canada. 

IN A NUTSHELL: MUST READ

#pnut4prez: Trump Is Winning, And The GOP Likes Winners

Even though Donald Trump won both Nebraska and West Virginia in last night’s primaries, Ted Cruz did cut a sliver of both states, with a high enough percentage to make us think he’s more popular when he stops talking. Bernie Sanders took home a win from West Virginia’s Democratic primary, which may have had something to do with Hillary Clinton’s beef with coal miners. Although this is Bernie’s 19th state, he still trails behind Hillary in delegates.

What does this mean?

With the Democratic party still divided, Republicans have resigned themselves to a Trump candidacy and are even becoming more optimistic about his chances. Despite his initial resistance, even Paul Ryan has scheduled time to hang out with The Donald. 

Good Read: Our Guide To The Campaign Trail

Protests Rise As Brazil Tries To Reinstate ‘Democracy-ish’

Well, that was fast. Just 12 hours after Lower House Speaker Waldir Maranhão annulled the impeachment vote against President Dilma Rousseff, he reversed the controversial decision, allowing the “democratic” process to move forward. Maranhão hasn’t given any reason for his mysterious change of heart, but the double-agent level of plot twists has left widespread disruption in Brazil. While the Senate plans to vote on Rousseff’s impeachment on Wednesday, her supporters have restarted protests, setting up burning barricades to block entrances to cities across the country. 

Required Read: The Prince, by Machiavelli 

NUTS AND BOLTS: SHOULD READ

North Korean General, Presumed Dead, Shows Up At Party 

General Ri Yong-gil, a senior North Korean military official who was believed to be executed earlier this year for corruption, might be alive and well after all. Ri turned up in official state media accounts of the recently concluded Workers’ Party Congress, after allegedly being executed for “factionalism, misuse of authority and corruption” just a few months prior. Being dead can’t stop you from retaining a position in the ruling party, because in North Korea, anything is possible. 

Good Read: The Orphan Master’s Son: A Novel (Pulitzer Prize for Fiction)

French Government Gives Labor Reforms Green Light

Despite MPs from the governing Socialist party vowing to vote down the bill, the French cabinet has given Prime Minister Manuel Valls the green light to force through highly controversial labor reforms without parliament’s approval. While proponents of reform believe the bill will help employers hire and fire more easily, critics argue that it will allow employers to bypass workers’ rights on wages and overtime. While announcing the cabinet’s decision to the National Assembly, Prime Minister Valls was met with a chorus of boos, but he has probably gotten used to it. 

Panama Is Flying Immigrants To US-Mexico Border

As part of a deal with Mexico, Panama intends to send a total of 3,995 Cuban immigrants to the US-Mexico border, where they will be allowed to stay for a maximum of 20 days. The migrants have been stranded in Central America after several countries closed their borders and stopped them from traveling north. Mexico is allowing them to stay for a measly 20 days for “humanitarian reasons” according to the ministry, but once there, the migrants are on their own. They will have to find their own way across the US border during that window. We are sure Trump must be thrilled. 

KEEPING OUR EYE ON…

British Petroleum: Surprising no one, BP is now linked to a bribery scandal revealed by the Panama Papers.Leaked documents show that BP signed a multimillion-dollar Iraq contract with a firm named in a corruption investigation. 

LOOSE NUTS: FOR YOUR ENJOYMENT

Budweiser Is Changing Its Name To America

It’s a sweet gesture to name their beer after the only country in the world who thinks that the product is real beer. Budweiser, the wheat-flavored water seller that is already a staple of Americana, will be swapping out every aspect of their brand to rename their beer America for the duration of the presidential election season. Calling the beer Amurca would have been more fitting but it’s probably copyrighted.